Le Blog: The Little Differences

See if you remember this scene from Pulp Fiction:

There are lots of little differences. I've listed just a few. Feel free to put more in the comment section.

Here are some: No tipping at restaurants; lemonade is soda; no swimming trunks at the swimming pool; eat with your fork and knife; smoke wherever you like; always say "goodbye" whenever departing anyone's company -- even if it's just the toll booth lady or the guy at the cash register; it takes a Euro coin to get a shopping cart (but you get your Euro back when you return the cart); special parking places for pregnant ladies; you have to ask for the restaurant bill or you will be there all night; the people who work at the grocery checkout have chairs and they get to sit down; stores, banks and post office close between 12 and 2; very few automatic cars (everyone drives a stick); salad comes near the end of a meal instead of the beginning; almost no traffic signals (they use the roundabout); everything is smaller in size except wine bottles -- it's like living in miniature land -- imagine a 7-oz. beer!; no peanut butter (this is unfortunate); bring your own bag to the grocery store or else; when you pick out your fruits and vegetables in the produce section of of the grocery store they weigh and tag them for you in the produce section -- then you take them up front to pay; do your business in one room and wash your hands in another; no need to wear a helmet apparently; dogs are welcome in restaurants; banks are also insurance agencies; the post office is also kind of a bank; a 1 is handwritten like a 7 and a 4 is handwritten like a 6; computer keyboards have the letters in different places; you cannot get a cup of coffee to go; light switches are square not rectangle; 220 volts throughout; flush with a button instead of a handle; loose change can amount to a fortune; . . . . the list goes on and on.

But one of the biggest little differences is that you should never show up on time when you are invited to someone's house for a social event. I repeat: resist the temptation to arrive on time or you will look like a jerk. You must come at least 15-30 minutes after the time you've been invited and that's the absolute minimum! Don't believe me? Here's a quote from one helpful guide: "Contrary to the custom in the U.S., showing up on time at a French home is really regarded as rude and not considerate of your hosts. Between 15 and 30 minutes late is considered very civilized."

Being very civilized, we have made it a point to show up late whenever we are invited to someone's house. The other day we hit the nail right on the head, showing up about 33 minutes late. The other guests (French) showed up about two minutes after us so we knew we had totally knocked it out of the park. High five!!

But as we learned a couple of days later, it can get a little confusing when your host knows that you are American and knows that in America we show up on time, and therefore expects that we will be unfamiliar with the French custom and outsmarts us by figuring that we'll show up right on time. Add to the mix the fact that, although our hosts live part-time in France they are actually Dutch and that they themselves show up on time, except when they are in France when they too follow the French custom of tardiness, but only with the French. It can all get very confusing. But we did not know any of this when we accepted an invitation for "apero" at 6:00 p.m. We sat around in our house until about 6:20, feeling very civilized, waiting to leave. We were just about to give it a few more minutes (we were looking to go 2-for-2 on show-up-times) when our hostess appeared on our front porch wondering where we were and whether we had forgotten the invitation! That took a bit of straightening out.

Are you wondering what "apero" is? Well, apero is a couple of drinks and some light snacks. It's a one-hour deal, maximum. Except when it's not. Because "apero" can also include a whole dinner. But you never know what your apero is going to consist of until you get there, unless there are hidden subtleties in the invitation that we are unaware of. So we enjoyed some drinks with our hostess and we were a little surprised when she then invited us outdoors for a sumptuous 3-hour feast! It was good. But next time should we clarify what the aprero will consist of? Or would that be rude?

Here are some random pictures from the week: